"Two and two... Twenty twooooo... "

I appear to have woken up on the wrong side of the bed this morning...actually, for how much of a stonker I am in, I may as well have awoken from slumber in a bed made of nails and just realised that I have had an unbridled night of passion with a paraplejic midget called Ron! Not sure whats wrong with me but I have a headache, stomach ache, tooth ache and ache ache! Not a happy chappy! I slept straight through my alarm at which point it is claimed that Richard hugged me and wished me a happy birthday... I did not know this and so when the first thing that he graced my morning with was "could you stop making so much noise please" I had the overwhelming desire to jump on him and rip his face off... quite understandable as Im sure you can see... or is this what it is like to get old and miserable.. but im not old.. which makes me just plain miserable... *WAHHHHH!!!*

I have plans today for my birthday when I finish work but firstly I need to try and get a parcel sorted that has come from Jasey. I need it to be delivered quite early on or Im going to be buggered for the plans I had this afternoon... I have sent an email to everyone and their dog at my local depot asking them to deliver the parcel early... So far no response.. Typical... bastards...

Went to my local all you can eat chinese last night. Was very enjoyable and means that I was able to have a meal out with my dad, Julie and Bev. Tonight, Richard is booking a table at an Indian that he reckons is nice in Knutsford so I am quite looking forward to that. Tomorrow its on to Knutsford again for pizza express. I have totally contradicted all the plans I set in stone yesterday but think this way it works out a lil better. Im a bit worried about my weight as I got on the scales this morning and weighed 11 stone 13. I have still got 3 meals out before Monday so I think Im gonna just have to throw caution to the wind and deal with it all next week...But i know I wont.. and then Ill get fat.. and everyone will point at me and say "there goes fat man adie..whatta joke!" and Richard will say that Im not fat, because thats what boyfriends have to say... He will say Im simply *gulp* "cuddly" *cries* and then ill eat more and more out of comfort and slowly but surely Ill turn into some gigantic beast with hips that dont lie.. (thank you for that song Shakira, but we cant tell a word you say in it... Because, and you know how I dont like being derogatory to female singing artists... but u drove it to me shakky baby.... you sound like a fucking sea lion!! Ow Ow Ow!!) where was I? Ahh yes, so Im feelin a lil porky... And Im not in the best of moods.... So watch out!!!!!

Bought some cakes in for work... I really dont think Ive brought enough in but as long as the people I work directly with get one then I dont mind... that means that I need about 5 cakes! Yayyy!! What is it that when its your birthday, you have to go out spending money buying cakes for people... Is it not meant to be the one day of the year that you get fed grapes and treated like a princess and that people buy you things?! But no, instead, you find yourself staggering around tesco at 10 o clock the night before (cos of course, up until that time u have forgotten all about it!) and spend half an hour choosing cakes for people at work... some of which you may not even like!? Take last year for example.. I spent about 18 pound, purely on cakes... And then you get your arch enemies (cos theres always more than one) sauntering up to your desk and turning their nose up at the selection that you have bought. "You could have brought more banoffee!?" "Sorry i dont DO flapjack.." "Did u not bring any weight watchers ones in?" I mean, the cheek of it all! Here have a cake... and shove it up your fussy arsed ring piece! Oooh, Id hate to be anyone that messes with me this morning!

Going to go and get my head from up my arse... Laters
xxx